I’ve had better days. On the way to work this morning a Keebler truck passed me on the freeway and my whole belief system began to unravel. Was there really a hollow tree and magic oven? If so, why would they need a truck to transport their goods? Had Ernie Keebler been fooling me all these years?

Before I reached my exit everything I believed in had been thrown into question. Maybe the Tooth Fairy really just walks from house to house. Or, leases an old Buick. Perhaps the Three Bears made up the whole story about the little blonde girl to garner sympathy from a gullible public. Was nothing real? What about our government leaders? What about the free enterprise system? What about the Magic oven?!

But, who was I to question the head elf? Sure, I eat the crackers and cookies. Sometimes I even pay for them. Does that give me the right to call an important elf like Ernie on the carpet to explain his motives and methods? That would certainly set a dangerous precedent. Next thing you know we would be holding religious leaders and elected officials accountable for their actions, throwing our entire way of life into disarray. There are some things we are better off not knowing; it’s common knowledge that “ignorance is bliss”.

After all, Ernie works in mysterious ways.


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