Chivalry Is Only Maimed
Placing the phone back in its cradle I found myself faced with a situation, not unlike those fabled knights of old, of slaying the dragon to protect fair maiden. The dragon in question was, in reality, a garter snake approximately 10 inches in length and slightly smaller around than your little finger. The fair maiden in need of rescue was a female friend of mine who lived in a duplex across town.
She discovered the beast sunning itself on the kitchen floor, in front of her sliding glass door, early one Sunday morning. Having already attempted to capture the thing, with a pair of long-handled meat tongs and a paper sack, she only managed to chase the elusive reptile under the china cupboard in the dining room. Undoubtedly, it chose this refuge to gather its wits and calculate an escape from the domicile of the creature with the misshapen hands in the purple housecoat.
At this point in the standoff she decided to call for my advice, or assistance. Remembering my noble lineage, and never one to leave a damsel in distress, I gladly offered to rescue her from this split-tongued monster. Of course, my gallant ancestors probably didn't make the princess wait until they finished their coffee and Grape-Nuts, and had taken a shower.
But times, after all, do change.
Well, Pinhole, as far as I can recall, dragon slaying was never considered to be a timed event. Besides, the terrifying little critter probably couldn't have gotten away.
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Actually, it did. Turned out my services weren't required, after all.
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oh my! I doubt I would have tried to get it myself!
soon after we had moved into this house, we had a similar incident. a small grass snake was in the kitchen. my son (age 7) saw it and told me. I made him go back in there to get the phone to call my husband. My 4 yr old daughter ran out the front door and stood at then end of the driveway screaming! I am sure the neighbors thought we were torturing her!
and yes, my husband came home from work to take care of this damsel in distress!
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Wow! Hard to tell who would be tougher to deal with...Social Services or the snake!
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Such nobility! I am glad you survived to chronicle the terrifying challenge!
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Me, too. Making it through an entire bowl of cereal was quite a challenge, since I had a cracked tooth, but a friend had dared me.
Oh well...as they say, "Some are born to Grape Nuts, and some have Grape Nuts thrust upon them".
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I grew up in Rattlesnake country.....need I say more? They don't hatch...they are born live and full of venom....sort of like some people I know....
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I grew up in copperhead country. Same thing only less dangerous.
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When I called you a superhero some time back, you said you couldn't quite accept the label. I should've known I'd aimed to low... you are nothing less than a knight in shining armor. (21st Century style, of course.)
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The armor's pretty rusty, truth be known. We won't get into why.
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So is a snake in a china cupboard anything like a bull in a china shop?
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No, not even close. Unless it's a huge snake with horns and hooves.
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Those knights of old probably would have required more time to get into their armor, saddle the horse and ride to the damsel's castle.
Malcolm
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Hey, you're right! I'll have to add that to my "Excuse File".
Thanks!
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