So, It's Not Just A Chocolate Bar
I’ve been unable to read “The Three Musketeers”, by Alexandre Dumas. It’s not that I haven’t wanted to; I simply can’t. About 3 pages in I always fall asleep. Narcotics aren’t this effective.
It isn’t the prose. Although some of the sentences run longer than Mrs. Crawford recommended in my sophomore English class, they are smooth and very readable. Classic images abound and adventure is never much more than a paragraph away. Why can’t I keep my eyes open?
Originally, I suspected it was because I was trying to read the book by itself. As some of you are aware, I always read 2 to 3 books, simultaneously, alternating between volumes depending on mood and location (I always keep a book in my file cabinet at work). Four is too many; one is insufficient to feed my attention span. Two or three manuscripts at a time has worked well for me, except that time in Mrs. Crawford’s class when I attempted to devour a Steinbeck novel, along with a famous work by Alistair MacLean, and managed to thoroughly confound everyone with a blistering 7 page oral report on “The Grapes of Navarone”.
But, I had forgotten about a half-digested Dave Barry collection resting beside the TV remote, so that eliminated the single book theory.
Certain that I was afflicted with some type of terminal reading malady I sought help from the only source I knew that might be able to save me: the local Librarian. I got the results of the preliminary tests yesterday, and my worst suspicions were confirmed. She had just finished reviewing my case and the prognosis is bleak.
By now, I’m sure you’ve guessed the diagnosis:
Apparently, I’m “Porthos Intolerant”.
your grapes of navarone is one of you all time best presentations, Pinhole. Hilarious!
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Thanks, FF&F. Just trying to get some of my stuff over here where I know the site will be up and viewable the majority of the time.
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I'm glad you rescued this from the cyber-rubble, Pinhole! So much good stuff went down with that ship.
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Thanks, Montucky. This is actually from a different blogsite that seems to be experiencing some similar, early symptoms as the one to which you referred. Just thought I'd be a little more proactive, this time.
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I've missed your stuff but thought of you today when I was asked to recommend some great blogs. Thought I'd stop by to let you know that your blog has been rated "E" for excellence. You can pick up your award here. :O)
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Thanks, Elizabeth Grace. I'm certain I don't deserve whatever this award involves, but I appreciate the thought. I'll check it out as soon as I can.
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I have a similar problem with trying to watch The Sound of Music all the way to the end. But, after decades of falling asleep in this part or that of the movie, I'm sure by now I've seen the whole thing - if in a piecemeal fashion. What if you try a tiny bite of Muskateers every day or so, and build up your tolerance? After all, there could be a misdiagnosis - could just be the feathers in their muskateer hats are getting up your nose. Or maybe it's a case of sword envy. Possibilities, that's all I'm saying...
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I hope I don't doze off, again, or my next report might be about 'The Sound of Musketeers'.
And the sword envy is likely. I was going to make a further remark about a pocketknife, but decided that was going a bit far.
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