Well, Then You Shouldn't Have Asked
Clearly, the wise folks at Shopko® think quite highly of me. Last week I received a personal correspondence from their home office mailed to “Valued Customer” at my home address. Since Gwendolyn hasn’t set foot in a Shopko® for years, (it’s a long story, but never approach her if you’re wearing a nametag reading “Brianna”) I can only assume, from the items pictured in the brochure, that they’re seeking my opinion regarding design, quality and economy of their merchandise.
The last time anyone dared to ask my opinion I was remanded to study hall, in the library, for the rest of the semester. Not fair, really. I meant “arrogant” in the nicest way possible, “blowhard” was simply an afterthought, and, contrary to Mr. Macklin’s claim, I’m pretty sure “twit” is an actual term in Geometry.
In reply to this thinly disguised advertisement, I offered that I had never seen that shade of orange in nature, much less on beef jerky; the pants are a terrific fit if your waist begins just above your shoulder blades; and while the futon on page 2 was not at all what my ass had anticipated, it seems to make a marvelous scratching post.
Today, I found out my evaluations weren’t as well received as I had hoped. But, on the plus side, a lot of the books in here I didn’t get a chance to finish.
After a rather tedious day, I needed a good laugh and the smiles that go along with them. This was definitely fun to read......My last year in high school, I was a hall monitor. I had to check the hall passes of the kids wandering the halls on their way here and there. Mostly, they were my friends who stopped for a long chat. Finally, the vice-principal stopped by and said, "Miss ZOla....this is the loudest desk I hear".....to which I replied....."Sir, if you are hearing desks, you need to see a shrink".....I think you and I must have shared the same study hall that day.
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My diploma read, simply, "Completed Four Years Of Study Hall". But no one's questioned it, so far.
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The nerve of those people!
They sent you MY mail!
Cheers,
Mitch
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Then you can have their steely glares, as well.
Whew! Glad to get rid of those!
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Gee, thanks for nothing. You do the damage, I get the blame.
Ouch!
Those piercing looks hurt!!
I'm changing my name to "Occupant!"
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Oh, you can run...but, you can't hide.
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Now I know why Gwendolyn did that to me when I last saw her. I'll make sure and return Brianna's nametag before I stop by next time.
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Smart move. I don't know why Gwendolyn's still so sensitive about the situation...you'd think she'd never seen a rotisserie before.
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I'm glad to see there is such an appreciation for historic places in your area. I would have thought that Library would have been gone years ago. Or maybe they knew,,,
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If they didn't know, I'm sure they, at least, suspected.
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Perhaps you need to talk to these people in person and explain that you have your fingers on the pulse of society.
Malcolm
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Not much I can do, though, unless I had my fingers around the neck of society.
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